I haven't written all week. I'm having trouble focusing the multitude of ideas that keep appearing in my mind's eye into anything sensible.
I drift off while cooking dinner into an essay about aging.
I slip away while changing a diaper—composing sentences about inspiration.
It's not the curse it was in school—this lack of focus. There is a blessing to be found in it. To have so many different places to go.
Harnessing the ideas into accomplishment is a challenge I haven't conquered, however.
For years I accepted it as fait accompli. You can't teach an old dog and so forth. But that doesn't sit comfortably in the pit of my stomach. How can I tell my son—who struggles with strikingly similar issues—that there are strategies, there is help, there is support—if I don't believe the same for myself?
Perhaps it's the milestone in my life that will occur tomorrow (when I turn forty) that has me looking at what is left. Not what has come before.
So I will write the essay on aging and compose the paragraph on inspiration — and so many more. Eventually.
I will put one foot in front of the other as it were. And forge ahead on the journey to my best self.
Happy birthday, friend!
I wish I had something better to say than forty is hardly aging, and any day that starts with a pretty little meal like that with two sweet boys around is a good way to start.
Hope your day is great!
Posted by: elizabeth of course | January 23, 2009 at 08:26 AM
Too much that we share a birthday! I hope you enjoy your day, that it is filled with a few moments of peace and maybe a surprise or two. Take care, and happy birthday. tt
Posted by: Tara Thayer | January 23, 2009 at 09:17 AM
Happy Birthday! I hope that you have a wonderful day.
Posted by: MichelleB | January 23, 2009 at 09:39 AM
I just discovered your blog last week and have truly enjoyed the peek into your world. Congratulations on not accepting what is and forging on in your journey. And, Happy Birthday! Just like your "resolution" post, be thankful in what you have accomplished & received, rather than what you haven't.
Posted by: erica | January 23, 2009 at 10:29 AM
Happy Birthday Amy! I've been forty since June and I'm here to tell you it's not so bad. I'm in such a better place than I was at 25 that I wouldn't want to trade--ok, maybe I'd trade for 35!
Putting one foot in front of the other is really the only way to do it, isn't it? I'm walking toward 41 right now.
Posted by: Alexis | January 23, 2009 at 11:18 AM
there are strategies? is there a name for what i have? because it sounds like you're describing me.
i hope you have a most happy birthday, amy, and get to do something special for yourself.
Posted by: maya | springtree road | January 23, 2009 at 11:52 AM
Happy, happy birthday my friend!
I have to say, the first 4 months of 40 have been fantastic for me. Onward and upward lady!
Posted by: caroline thornewill | January 23, 2009 at 12:08 PM
Happy Birthday, my love.
Posted by: Niall | January 23, 2009 at 07:17 PM
Happy Birthday Amy...hope you have a wonderful day!
Posted by: Sarah | January 23, 2009 at 07:45 PM
Amy I hope you have the best birthday:) I will look forward to reading your essay on aging, I have so many thoughts about it myself...
Posted by: Cindy | January 23, 2009 at 10:56 PM
Well put. Happy birthday to you! I hope it is a beautiful day for you. :)
Posted by: Laura | January 23, 2009 at 11:54 PM
Happy Birthday! Hope you have fun plans with the fam :)
Posted by: Amy @ parkcitygirl | January 24, 2009 at 12:55 PM
Happy Birthday! I'm actually heading out to a good friend's 40th birthday party in just a little bit. I hope your day is splendid and full of fun and smiles and laughter. You are the best and I'm sending loads of birthday wishes your way.
Posted by: jessica | January 24, 2009 at 01:30 PM